What Diet Resolutions?

We is in trouble now...and by we, I mean me and my fat ass.

I could tell you I have binger's remorse, but I don't. Not even a little bit. I completely enjoyed every slice of that large gourmet veggie pizza. And for dessert, eight of Trader Joe's Mini Mint Ice Cream Mouthfuls disappeared down the abyss otherwise known as my throat.

These are basically Oreo cookies with mint chocolate chip ice cream filling instead of just plain cream filling. OMG, Hea-Ven! Those mini mouthfuls come in a box of 12. Aren't you proud of me that I was able to stop at eight instead of devouring all 12? heeee

It's hard to say what made me binge. Could be a number of things...

a) my nearly three week vacation coming to an end
b) making up for the three weeks, almost four weeks, of feeling sick and eating nothing but eggs, bread, lite broth-like soup and rice
c) I'm just a fat piggy, and a piggy will eat what she wants
d) feeling like I could afford a binge cuz Sugar Coated Candyman said I look quite slim - oh, you bet he was rewarded for that comment =)
e) I have a tapeworm
f) getting back on the no carb diet on Monday, in anticipation of Chinese New Year binges
g) all of the above
h) a, b and e, but not f
i) c, d and f, but not b
j) make your own combination of the above

True, a large gourmet veggie pizza is a lot to consume at once, but at least it's more nutritious than my meals of late...milk and chocolate chip cookies.

Chubby Chased 5

Round Table Pizza has a "Gourmet" Veggie pizza on their menu. Description of the pizza, copied from their site: Artichoke hearts, zucchini, spinach, white mushrooms, Roma tomatoes, red & green onions, Italian herb seasoning, and lots of chopped garlic. Baked with a blend of 3 cheeses on our Creamy Garlic Sauce. I put gourmet in quotes cuz I'm guessing they consider it gourmet just because of artichoke hearts, zucchini & spinach?

Don't get me wrong, it's a good tasting pizza, it's just that Round Table is a bit skimpy with the ingredients. Sometimes I add more artichoke hearts & zucchini when I get home. Also, wait til you get a coupon. The coupon price is much easier to swallow.

So...once when I went to pick up my large Gourmet Veggie, an extra large Mexican guy walked in ahead of me. Unfortunately, the Round Table employee wasn't behind the counter so Chubby Chaser took the opportunity to talk to me.

Chubby Chaser: (makes no effort to hide that he's checking me out) Hey.

Fat Girl: (look in his general direction, but make no eye contact) Hi.

Chubby Chaser: How are you?

Fat Girl: Fine. Thanks.

Chubby Chaser: They're kinda slow.

Fat Girl: Hm? Oh. Ya.

Chubby Chaser: So, are you eating here?

Fat Girl: Nope. Picking up.

Chubby Chaser: Too bad. I coulda used some company.

Fat Girl: (blank stare. as if I would keep him company)

Thankfully, Round Table employee finally appeared behind the counter & took Chubby Chaser's order. I was doubly thankful that he quickly said, "Next customer, please."

I presented my coupon & Round Table employee said he could take two more dollars off the coupon price. Score! That was karma paying me back for putting up with Chubby Chaser.

If I got a discount every time I went to Round Table, I may not be opposed to being Chubby Chased. I know, I'm such a pizza whore.