Chubby Chased 5

Round Table Pizza has a "Gourmet" Veggie pizza on their menu. Description of the pizza, copied from their site: Artichoke hearts, zucchini, spinach, white mushrooms, Roma tomatoes, red & green onions, Italian herb seasoning, and lots of chopped garlic. Baked with a blend of 3 cheeses on our Creamy Garlic Sauce. I put gourmet in quotes cuz I'm guessing they consider it gourmet just because of artichoke hearts, zucchini & spinach?

Don't get me wrong, it's a good tasting pizza, it's just that Round Table is a bit skimpy with the ingredients. Sometimes I add more artichoke hearts & zucchini when I get home. Also, wait til you get a coupon. The coupon price is much easier to swallow.

So...once when I went to pick up my large Gourmet Veggie, an extra large Mexican guy walked in ahead of me. Unfortunately, the Round Table employee wasn't behind the counter so Chubby Chaser took the opportunity to talk to me.

Chubby Chaser: (makes no effort to hide that he's checking me out) Hey.

Fat Girl: (look in his general direction, but make no eye contact) Hi.

Chubby Chaser: How are you?

Fat Girl: Fine. Thanks.

Chubby Chaser: They're kinda slow.

Fat Girl: Hm? Oh. Ya.

Chubby Chaser: So, are you eating here?

Fat Girl: Nope. Picking up.

Chubby Chaser: Too bad. I coulda used some company.

Fat Girl: (blank stare. as if I would keep him company)

Thankfully, Round Table employee finally appeared behind the counter & took Chubby Chaser's order. I was doubly thankful that he quickly said, "Next customer, please."

I presented my coupon & Round Table employee said he could take two more dollars off the coupon price. Score! That was karma paying me back for putting up with Chubby Chaser.

If I got a discount every time I went to Round Table, I may not be opposed to being Chubby Chased. I know, I'm such a pizza whore.

Teen Piggy

Once there was a two-night youth group sleepover at our house when I was in eight or ninth grade. Yes, this little piggy used to be a good little church girl. Can you imagine? Now,I might be headed straight to hell. Wanna carpool?

Mama Piggy was cool and kept us supplied with Coke, 7Up, Mountain Dew, potato chips, doritos, cookies, fig newtons and candy. We got to order pizza, burgers & fries, and more pizza. It was great to be allowed to eat all that for two days, but honestly, I missed Mama Piggy's cooking.

So...one of those afternoons, we were gathered in the living room doing some sort of group exercise. There were bowls of junk food everywhere. I was particularly attentive to my sour cream & onion potato chips while most of my team was focused on the exercise.

Fanny spoke very softly and was not demanding in anyway. (I wonder if she's still the same way.) She was sitting two people away from me. Speaking to no one in particular, Fanny asked for the bowl of doritos to be passed. No one responded so she asked again. And again her request was not heard, except by me. Instead of asking again, Fanny reeeached over and passed the bowl herself. Then she said, "Thank you."!

I wanted to laugh so hard! I know, it was kinda mean of me not to help her but I wanted to see what she would do. In a way, she's a lot like this little piggy. Fanny doesn't let little things get between her and her food.